When I gave up trying. I end up knowing.

Friday, November 05, 2010

I am far from being perfect.

That is one thing I know of. Sure of. And that's one thing I never deny.

I look highly of myself. Because I love myself. I am 26 now and I've had my share of life. I know the bitter-sweet realities of life. And what it's got to offer. But I am aware that this is a constant learning process. And as we grow old, we'll understand things more.

I think of myself as an accomplished person. I was able to find the real me. I was able to embrace the person inside me. I was never ashamed. Though alot think I am a rebel, I think of myself as a genius.

But once in a while, that genius could act like a dumb blonde. There are times when I feel like the most stupid creature of this planet. But most of the time, I choose to play stupid. Because I chose to love.

Another relation is doomed to fail. Another heartbreak. But this one for me, is the most painful. I wont elaborate, I wont explain. I don't need to anyway.

I give up and I let go. Not because I stopped loving. But because I learned that loving is not enough. Because I learned to love more. I know that the moment you stopped loving yourself, you stopped other people from treating you well. This is another choice I need to make. I chose to love myself.

I've been thru hell. Met the devil. Made love with the devil at times. And I never regret that. Because of those decisions, I am a better me. But I am now wiser. And because I wanted to be wiser, I chose to get hurt now.

Thank you for everything. As I've said, a thousand times over to you. You will be my last. And i loved you so much. Loved you deeply. You will remain to be the best thing that ever happened to me. The best...

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